The Last 7 Years

July 12, 2008 at 11:11 am (My ramblings)

It never ceases to amazes me that on July 14, 2001 my life as a new creation in Christ began. Each year around this date, I take myself back to where I was and what I was doing before this. It’s not pretty and I don’t do it to condemn myself but I do it so I never, ever forget the depths that my gracious God pulled me out of. The last few days before I surrendered my life to Christ were filled with drunkeness, sin, shame, despair, depression, guilt and so much more.  About 9 months prior to this, I was in the hospital hooked up to life support machines to breathe for me since I couldn’t do it my own. How does a person get to that point of desperation that the only way out is to take a bottle of pills with a bottle of liquor and hope they never wake up? I can’t even believe that was me 7 years ago. It’s almost surreal because I don’t think I have ever been happier than I am today. To think that the enemies plans for my life almost succeeded but because I am so loved by my Creator that God chose me before time began and has called me for such a time as this. Boggles my mind!

As I look back on another incredible year, I see God’s hand and goodness all over my life. Another year in Bible college, going to Africa last summer, bringing my family closer together, paying off more debt, a new job, great friends who love me, brokeness at the sins in my life, greater faith, another year walking in purity, learning that I am a princess, a new church and a godly man who thinks I am “drop dead gorgeous.”  There is so much more but those are a few highlights. I know this next year will be even more amazing than the past one although to think that my life will get better just blows my mind.

I am going to go dig up my old journals and will try to post some of my entries from around the time of my salvation. It’s always heart wrenching to read about my past but on the same note, so fantastic because I am the result of someone who has been chosen, forgiven, redeemed, cleansed, loved and set free and for that, I will always be forever grateful.

Thank you Jesus for loving me when no one else did. Thank you that before time began, my name was engraved on your hand. A hand that was pierced for me and my sins. Thank you for making me the apple of your eye. Thank you for loving me with an everlasting love. Thank you for setting my heart free. Thank you for taking my mustard seed sized faith and growing it up to where I believe you will move any mountain for me. Thank you that although I am stained crimson, you see me in a white robe. Thank you for making me your bride. Thank you that you are restoring to me what the locusts have eaten. Thank you for taking me out of the mud and mire and setting my feet upon the Rock. Thank you for being the lifter of my head. Thank you that my sins are forgiven from as far as the East is from the West. Thank you that your plans are to prosper me and not to harm me.  Thank you that you are loving to me. Thank you for hearing my cries for mercy. Thank you for disciplining me because you love me. Thank you that you are close to the brokenhearted. Thank you that I have been called according to your purpose. Thank you that you are slow to anger and abounding in love. Thank you for creating my inmost being. Thank you that you have ordained all my days. Thank you that you keep no record of my wrongs. Thank you that you never sleep or slumber but always watch over me. Thank you that your mercies and compassion are new every day. Thank you Jesus, for the Cross.

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